Monday, July 11, 2011

Sometimes there aren't words

July 11, 2011

Now for those of you who know me I'm usually never at a loss for words. However, this time it's different. I don't think there is a word, in any existing language, to describe what I'm feeling. I'm glad to be seeing people I had left a year ago here in the States, heart is broken having had to leave Madagascar. Bitter-sweet isn't strong enough. It's though I'm experiencing a death by leaving Mada but a heartbeat or breath of life as I re-enter “home”.

The death of new yet deep relationships. A heartbeat by seeing an old friend.

The death of a wonderful people group and culture. A breath of fresh air being in the presence of family.

The death of a language I worked so hard on. A heartbeat of being able to speak a sentence without having to think for 5 minutes first.

The death of a dream come true. A breath of fresh air worshiping with my church family.

A death of sitting around for hours and just being with Helena (my best Malagasy friend). A heartbeat eatting really good ice cream with my mom.

I guess that's life, isn't it? Experiencing death and new life throughout a life time....bitter-sweet....


  1. Your post is analogous of our spiritual battle of dying to ourselves and living for Christ. It's truly a daily and sometimes painful battle and one in which all believers look forward to the day when there is no more sorrow, or pain, or death but only life. But until then, I guess the bitter moments make the sweet ones that much sweeter...

    Hey, now I have a craving for Rosemarie's water ice!

  2. Welcome in the club.... That's our life, as missionaries. Written from a homesick for Madagascar friend - Tanja in Germany